2018 has been quite a year! So much so that, despite it being months since my last post, I felt the need to write something here to mark it in some way. I wish I could pour out everything that’s happened – writing being cathartic and all that – but this has never been that sort of blog and actually, the less often I write here, the more self-conscious I feel when I do, so I find myself sharing less and less. In any case, some things need to be private.
So… why blog at all? What can I share? Well, 2018 was a crunch year for me. A year of crisis in some ways but also of rebirth. I’ve experienced things this year that I never want to experience again. Feelings, situations and dynamics that have been building for years finally erupted, altering the landscape forever. And it was hard. Really, really hard.
But I’m very lucky to have a wonderful family and amazing friends who, as the dust settled, helped me navigate a new path. And art played a crucial role too – many things I couldn’t express in words came out through swirls of ink and paint. I shared quite bit of it – looking back through my instagram feed I can see the various events the year unfolding (even if they are in a kind of code).
And now, poised on the edge of the old year and the brink of a new one, I’m trying to work out how I feel. There is definitely a huge swath of relief in the mix – what happened was always going to happen in some form or other (I mean that in a practical sense rather than a fated one) so I’m very happy indeed to be on the other side of it. I also feel happiness, because of the wonderful people I am surrounded by, and immensely fortunate about the many ways in which my life is good.
And for the year ahead, I’m excited. The seismic shift has meant things are moving in the right direction and I feel really positive about that. There will be more jolts to come but my feet are more firmly planted now and I know who to hold on to and who will be holding on to me.
Also, having completed my Illustration Diploma this year and set up my new website, I’ve recently had more creative projects coming my way which gives me lots to look forward to. I’m particularly excited about a picture book I’m illustrating for Reneé Davis who blogs at Mummy Tries. Reneé’s eldest daughter has autism and the book is told from her perspective. I’ll share more about it as the project progresses!
Who knows what 2019 will hold (and there’s so much that could be said about that, politically speaking!) but I feel ready to take it on. Or ready as I’ll ever be. And that, my friends, is enough.
Happy New Year!