An elephant… to say any more would give the game away…

So, I’ve got as far as week seven of my #limerick challenge and they seem to get grosser every week. And I’m afraid this week is no exception. In my defence, I am writing them for my sons so I can’t write anything highbrow (is there such a thing as a highbrow limerick?) and anyway, gross things do make small boys laugh. When I wrote one with a more grown-up cultural reference they just looked non-plussed so I tend to stick to more ridiculous/disgusting themes.

You see I’m really a very sensible, mature person… oh whatever… here’s this week’s limerick. The boys asked me to write about an elephant:

A lumbering, clumsy young elephant

Crashed into a tree with a belly-thump

But the only result

Of this frontal assault

Was she let out a long, loud and smelly pump*

* I’ve a feeling this term is only used in the north-east. In case you’re from anywhere else in the country/world, it means ‘fart’. I assume I don’t need to translate ‘fart’. I can’t believe I’m now explaining slang terms for bottom-emissions. This is not what I started this blog for *sigh*. I’m sensible and mature, remember that.

As usual, the boys illustrated my limerick. My six-year-old drew the picture below and my four-year-old drew the one at the top of the post (I have a tiny hunch he may have been copying his big brother.)

Farting elephant. The arrow shows where she ran into the tree. The red dot is where she hit her tummy.

And yes, I realise the rhyme is terrible. Although it does sound better than it looks written down so I suggest you read it out loud. Especially if you are on a crowded train.

Shall I try a better rhyme and less-disgusting theme next week?