change

balls

I didn’t write my usual ‘so how’s my writing week gone?’ post last Friday. Instead of being at home attempting to fit writing and blogging in around the school run, housework and child-wrangling I was a hundred miles from home in a succession of meetings. With the baby in tow too, as I’d failed to find alternative childcare for him.

It was an interesting day! Actually the baby did pretty well, all things considered. I did have to watch one presentation from outside the room, peering in through the window (like some sort of weird stalker) while bouncing him in my arms, and simultaneously attempting to stop him from chewing the fronds of a nearby pot plant. But I guess that’s motherhood for you: you’ve got to expect to find yourself in ridiculous situations.

As you may have guessed from this, my lovely year of maternity leave has come to an end. I’m now trying to pick up the pieces of my previous existence and work out how to juggle the extra ‘balls’ of a baby (who’s still not sleeping properly), an unwell husband, a blog and a creative writing-itch I can no longer ignore.

It’ll be fine: I’m reducing my previous twice-monthly travel to a lot more Skyping and conference calls, and I’m mostly going to be working from home. My big boys are very happy at school and the baby is due to start at (their old) nursery any day so child-care is nearly sorted. And it’s only part-time anyway so totally manageable.

But I’d be lying if I said it all wasn’t playing on my mind at the moment. I’m forever adding things to my ‘to do’ list and am constantly feeling like I’m not getting enough done.

This has had a big impact on my writing this week: I am feeling totally uninspired. Which is not helped by the fact that every time I sit down to write, I remember something else that needs doing and either leap up to do it or just put it on the list and then faff around on Facebook to distract myself. I’m completely unfocussed.

I did have a brilliant idea for a short story last week (brilliant, that is, in the way that ideas can be before you start trying to actually write them) but I haven’t managed to write a single word of it yet.

I’ll get there. But until then, I really must do the hoovering… and the washing so we don’t have another morning when I’m scraping baked beans off yesterday’s school jumper…

4 thoughts on “change

  1. Sadie Hanson

    I haven’t had a great writing week either; I’ve been so absorbed with my little book launch but have begun to reread the first draft of my manuscript, so I guess that counts as something. (ps. I hope you like my anthology). X

    Reply
    1. Maddy Post author

      That sounds like ‘something’ to me Sadie… and congrats and good luck with the book launch! (and I DO like your anthology!)

      Reply
  2. suzanne3childrenandit

    This sounds very much like my life Maddy. I am constantly pulled this way and that, left feeling very torn and not doing anything well. I guess it’s about setting rules and boundaries but with a young baby that must be nigh on impossible, and one that doesn’t sleep either? Wow! Good luck with everything :)

    Reply
  3. Maddy Post author

    Thanks Suzanne! When I have a good(ish) night of sleep I feel so much better and everything feels managable. But when I have a bad night. Urgh.

    Reply

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