baby love

mum and baby

I am besotted with my baby. There’s just no other way of putting it. He’s eleven months old now which seems to me to be a completely delicious age: he’s full of character but hasn’t started to assert himself and shout ‘no’ at me yet!

Of course, I love his older brothers just as much, and my feelings for them have grown into something more complex as they have developed. I think maternal love can only grow deeper as children get older and become more themselves.

But there’s something so primal about the way a mother loves a baby and which is reflected right back in the way a baby loves her. I’ve never spent more than a couple of hours away from my little one but when I greet him after any separation it’s still a thrill for both of us.

And he’s my last baby so I’ve been really making sure I make the most of our time together. Milestones this time round are bittersweet because I know they are the ‘last firsts’. That sounds a bit maudlin which is not how I mean it; I love seeing him develop. It’s just sometimes, especially after his bedtime feed when I’m alone with him in the near-darkness and he’s all warm and sleepy in my arms, I can’t help but wish I could freeze time somehow. To stay in that moment where life is as simple as the bond between us. That’s what inspired me to write this poem:

 

Beloved

You are warm in my arms
snuggled to my chest
soft hair tickling me
with every breath

My gaze caresses you
drinking you in
the curve of your brow
your flawless skin

Plump cheeks flushed
in the nightlight’s glow
pink lips tracing
a cupid’s bow

Your eyelashes fluttering
as dreams drift by
contentment caught
in a sleeping sigh

As I stroke your fingers,
brush your nose with a kiss
I ache at the thought
of losing moments like this

And wish I could capture
forever this time
when, tiny and perfect,
you are utterly mine.

I’m linking this up with Prose for Thought over at Verily Victoria Vocalises.

 

26 thoughts on “baby love

  1. Stephanie

    Lovely, I can really see the lips – I know just what you mean. I love looking at my daughter asleep. She’s three now but my last so still a baby to me.

    Reply
    1. Maddy Post author

      Thanks Stephanie. There’s something special about a sleeping child I think. Even my six-year-old seems like a baby when he’s asleep.

      Reply
    1. Maddy Post author

      Thanks. Yes, I think it’s quite addictive! My older two went through a stage of sharing a bed (their choice!) and I used to sneak into their room to see them curled up together like contented puppies.

      Reply
  2. Helen Braid

    Oh this is just beautiful. My little girl is over 2 now. Barely any baby left. But she still curls up in my arms for her bedtime drink of milk. Its the nicest part of the day xx

    Reply
  3. Philippa @elliotandme

    I really love this. I feel exactly this about my littlest. He’s only 6 weeks and I’m making sure to really enjoy every moment as much as I can. The nighttime feeds I was desperate to sleep through with number 1 are suddenly so special as it’s the only time where I really get to just be with my baby. You’ve captured this perfectly. Well done :)

    Reply
    1. Maddy Post author

      I agree! And third time round it all seems so much easier too – I can enjoy my littlest’s baby years more than I could his older brother’s because I am so much more relaxed!

      Reply
  4. Jenny

    Lovely photo. I always loved the pictures of mother and baby in bed. unfortunately neither of my child ever fall asleep on me or with me and if they did my luck there would be no one there to help capture the moment. Its such a sweet loving picture. I love your poem too. I do a lot of poetry on my blog, especially ones about parenting and my kids. Just great. #magicmoments

    Reply
    1. Maddy Post author

      Thanks Jenny. It’s actually a photo of me with my first-born taken six-and-a-half years ago! No such pictures exist of me with either of the other two but first time round we photographed everything all the time! Kids are a great inspiration for poetry aren’t they?

      Reply

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