a song for Santa

Dear Santa,

I know you’re very busy and this is not the best time of year to approach you with any extra requests, but I was just wondering if you could grant me this one wish? You see, I’d very much like some sleep please.

This is serious. The baby is nine months old now which – given the discomforts of late pregnancy – means it’s now been roughly a year since I last had a solid, delicious eight hours. Or anything close.

I don’t mean to whinge, except that, well, actually I DO mean to whinge.

Look, I’ve even rewritten the words of my favourite carol just to explain how serious the situation is:


 Oh Holy Sh*teadvent tree

*Lovely piano intro with tingling bells*

Oh holy sh*te, the baby isn’t sleeping,

This is the night when I may lose the plot.

Long, painful hours where I am gently weeping

As I stand helplessly near the cot.

A stab of cramp my weary legs are trembling

The hours drag slowly on towards the morn.

I fall on my knees and wildly I beseech him

Oh baby of mine, I know you’re tired, I’ve seen you yawn.

Oh Christ, Just CLO-OSE YOUR EYES!  It’s nearly dawn!


So you see Santa, I’m really tired.

I promise to leave you a bottle of whiskey if you can grant me this one special Christmas wish (although I can’t promise not to have drunk most of the bottle in an attempt to get some frikkin’ sleep).

Lots of love



Prose for Thought
Check out the other #prose4T posts over at Verily Victoria Vocalises!

22 thoughts on “a song for Santa

  1. Dragonsflypoppy-White feathers

    Oh I do hope that Santa is reading this and that you get your wish. Sleep deprivation really is tortuous. But you will sleep again…one day….. xx

  2. Stephanie

    Oh I know this song well!! My lot still don’t give me sleep and the youngest is nearly three. This reminds me of that book that Morgan Freeman read – Go The F*ck to Sleep!

  3. Wicked World of Lucas

    Loving this (sorry for your lack of sleep) but this is gonna go on the list of one of my favourite carols EVER………… #prose4T

  4. Maddy Post author

    Glad to hear it made you laugh Victoria! Sometimes I think that writing is the only thing keeping me sane! I love the #prose4T linky.

  5. Donna Navarro

    You’ve stolen my wish list! I hope Santa is listening. Two and a half years in and there’s nothing I’d like more than a full night of unbroken sleep.

    1. Maddy Post author

      Oh Donna, you poor thing. Two and a half years is unacceptable! Thankfully my big boys are star sleepers or I would have no brain cells left at all! Wishing you lots of sleep too!xx

  6. Anna

    This made me smile! And took me back to a memory long buried of that tune going round and round in my head night after night when up with a six month old Martha… Ahh… This too will pass.. Hang in there!

  7. Mummy Tries

    Thanks for this lovely, it’s good to know your son is doing so much better now. Fingers crossed this is just a short phase for us while he’s cutting teeth and has a cold xxx

  8. Fiona

    Hi Maddy.. GREAT song !!

    I write music for babies and parents with the sleep requirements of all in mind…

    Listen here at http://www.earlybirdmusic.ie and see if the music can calm and soothe both you and baby.

    Hope it helps…. God knows I’ve been there !! Ths is where these songs come from!

    Best to you,



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