Dear Santa,
I know you’re very busy and this is not the best time of year to approach you with any extra requests, but I was just wondering if you could grant me this one wish? You see, I’d very much like some sleep please.
This is serious. The baby is nine months old now which – given the discomforts of late pregnancy – means it’s now been roughly a year since I last had a solid, delicious eight hours. Or anything close.
I don’t mean to whinge, except that, well, actually I DO mean to whinge.
Look, I’ve even rewritten the words of my favourite carol just to explain how serious the situation is:
Oh Holy Sh*te
*Lovely piano intro with tingling bells*
Oh holy sh*te, the baby isn’t sleeping,
This is the night when I may lose the plot.
Long, painful hours where I am gently weeping
As I stand helplessly near the cot.
A stab of cramp my weary legs are trembling
The hours drag slowly on towards the morn.
I fall on my knees and wildly I beseech him
Oh baby of mine, I know you’re tired, I’ve seen you yawn.
Oh Christ, Just CLO-OSE YOUR EYES! It’s nearly dawn!
So you see Santa, I’m really tired.
I promise to leave you a bottle of whiskey if you can grant me this one special Christmas wish (although I can’t promise not to have drunk most of the bottle in an attempt to get some frikkin’ sleep).
Lots of love
Maddyxxx
Oh I do hope that Santa is reading this and that you get your wish. Sleep deprivation really is tortuous. But you will sleep again…one day….. xx
Thanks! I hope you’re right!
Oh I know this song well!! My lot still don’t give me sleep and the youngest is nearly three. This reminds me of that book that Morgan Freeman read – Go The F*ck to Sleep!
I’ve heard of that book – need to get myself a copy I think! Wishing you lots of sleep xx
A heartfelt plea indeed! Hope you get your wish granted before Christmas!
Thank you – so do I!
Great poem – last night I had one hour of sleep…toddler with chickenpox ;-( so know exactly how it feels..*yaaaaaawn*
One hour?! Ouch! Hope your little one recovers soon and you get lots of lovely sleep xx
Loving this (sorry for your lack of sleep) but this is gonna go on the list of one of my favourite carols EVER………… #prose4T
Glad you liked it! Thanks!
Beautiful, although not so good that your not getting sleep, hope you get some soon x
Thanks Jaime. I’ll get there in the end!
This is fab – as soon as I read the first line I started laughing!! But seriously, I hope you managed to get some sleep very soon. Thank you for linking to Prose for Thought x
Glad to hear it made you laugh Victoria! Sometimes I think that writing is the only thing keeping me sane! I love the #prose4T linky.
You’ve stolen my wish list! I hope Santa is listening. Two and a half years in and there’s nothing I’d like more than a full night of unbroken sleep.
Oh Donna, you poor thing. Two and a half years is unacceptable! Thankfully my big boys are star sleepers or I would have no brain cells left at all! Wishing you lots of sleep too!xx
This made me smile! And took me back to a memory long buried of that tune going round and round in my head night after night when up with a six month old Martha… Ahh… This too will pass.. Hang in there!
Oh that first christmas with our firstborns… I remember it so well!xx
Oh Maddy I really hope Santa is listening… there is nothing worse than being deprived of much needed sleep!
Thanks Helen!
Thanks for this lovely, it’s good to know your son is doing so much better now. Fingers crossed this is just a short phase for us while he’s cutting teeth and has a cold xxx
Hi Maddy.. GREAT song !!
I write music for babies and parents with the sleep requirements of all in mind…
Listen here at http://www.earlybirdmusic.ie and see if the music can calm and soothe both you and baby.
Hope it helps…. God knows I’ve been there !! Ths is where these songs come from!
Best to you,
Fiona